How do you talk to your teen if you think they’re using drugs? A lot of resources tell parents what not to do, but it’s less common to come across what to do. It’s best to stay calm, choose a private moment, name specific signs, and ask direct but non-accusatory questions. If problems persist, professional treatment for teen drug use can help.
Early intervention is one of the best gifts you can give a teen who is struggling with any mental health concern continually. Whether it’s substance abuse, anxiety, ADHD, depression, or a combination, early intervention is linked to positive treatment outcomes. In this case, that includes a lower risk of chronic addiction or relapse.
Portum Wellness provides free, confidential assessments for families who are concerned about their teen. Whether you’re looking for local support or are reading this to learn about the signs of teen drug use and what to do next, we’re here to give you a clear path forward.
Why Teen Drug Use Can Be Hard to Spot
Knowing the line between normal teen behavior and what requires professional help can be tough for some parents. Teens go through a lot of changes. This can make it hard to spot teen drug use. Talking about what’s normal and what’s not can help.
While it can be tough for parents, some behaviors are developmentally normal and expected during adolescence. For example, testing limits more (e.g., begging for a later curfew), exploring new interests and fashion styles, talking back, or having mood swings that last for a few minutes to a few days.
There’s also the fact that many teens struggle with mental health. It is very common for mental health conditions like depression to start during adolescence. Differentiating this from drug use can be hard since certain indicators can overlap. There are ways to figure it out; a mental health professional can often help.
Behavioral Signs of Teen Drug Use
Drug use affects behavior and mental health. Behavioral signs of teen drug use you might notice include:
- Increased secrecy.
- Lying.
- New friend group.
- Sudden changes in grades.
- Breaking curfew.
- Loss of interest in activities (e.g., hobbies, athletics).
- Missing school.
- Loss of motivation.
- Irritability.
- Isolation.
- Money missing.
Usually, drug use comes with multiple signs and symptoms. For example, loss of interest in activities without any other signs of substance abuse could be attributed to another condition, like depression. If it’s paired with other symptoms of drug use, however, it is more likely that substance use is part of the equation.
Physical Signs Parents May Notice
Physical signs paired with changes in behavior are often what alert parents to teen drug use:
- Red eyes.
- Unusual sleepiness.
- Excessive, erratic energy.
- Widely dilated or pinpoint pupils.
- Drug paraphernalia in your child’s room or belongings.
- Poor coordination.
- Unexplained smell.
- Frequent use of eye drops.
- Changes in hygiene.
- Appetite changes.
Some teens could have unexplained health complaints. For example, persistent coughing in those who use substances via smoking or withdrawal symptoms.
Common Substances Teens May Use
Here are the most common substances teens use.
- Vaping/nicotine
- Cannabis
- Alcohol
- Prescription drugs (e.g., prescription stimulants)
Some signs of teen substance use can vary based on drug type. Parents often have strong intuition they can trust. If you suspect something, an open conversation can be an important first step.
How to Talk to Your Teen If You Suspect Drug Use
Deciding what to say first is important for parents who suspect teen drug use. It can be helpful to start the conversation with a general check-in. “I have noticed ___ and wanted to ask – how have you been doing lately?”
Here is a sample script for bringing drug use up directly: “I am not angry and will not be angry if you say yes. Your pupils were large when you came in last night, and you did not seem like yourself. If you have been vaping, drinking, or using drugs, I want to know what’s going on so that I can help. I love you and want to keep you safe.”
Staying calm makes it more likely that your teen will be able to be honest with you. Even if they are defensive or upset right now, not getting angry at your teenager is important because it means they know it is emotionally safe to talk with you later and that you will be there to help.
Parents may need to have multiple conversations about the topic. This is something to be prepared for. Discussing drugs and alcohol with your teen as a general topic matters, whether it’s experimenting or continuous use. But, if substance use or any other mental health concerns are ongoing, it is likely time to seek professional help.
When to Get Professional Help
How do you know if it is time to seek professional help for a teen who is using drugs? There’s a difference between experimentation and a substance use problem. Look for:
- Repeated use.
- School and/or legal consequences.
- Mental health symptoms.
- Withdrawal concerns.
- Inability to stop.
- Risky behavior.
Teen substance use treatment recognizes that substance abuse can affect anyone and that family members play an important role in the recovery process. Our in-person and virtual outpatient programs allow teens to sleep and live at home while getting effective treatment for drug and alcohol use.
Call Portum Wellness, a Trusted Adolescent Treatment Center in New Jersey
Not all treatment programs are the same. Not only do we offer care without inpatient hospitalization, but we accept most forms of insurance and use evidence-based, compassionate practices to help teens heal. Parents are partners in care from day one. Call Portum Wellness at (551) 368-6074. Whether you need help finding clarity about what’s going on or are ready to start the admissions process for your teen now, we’re here for you 24/7.
FAQ
How do I know if my teen is using drugs?
Look for patterns, not one isolated sign. Changes in behavior, friends, grades, mood, sleep, secrecy, physical appearance, or motivation may point to substance use, especially when several signs appear together.
How should I talk to my teen about drug use?
It can be hard to start the conversation about teen drug use. To approach the topic and make it more productive, we and other professionals recommend that you:
- Choose a calm, private moment (e.g., not before an important event or after an argument).
- Name what you have noticed.
- Ask direct questions.
- Avoid shaming.
- Listen carefully.
- Set clear expectations around safety and honesty.
If there are any immediate risks (e.g., illicit drugs in your teen’s belongings), remove them, even if you haven’t had the conversation yet. This can be a good way to start the conversation: “I am not angry but want to talk to you about what I found in your stuff.”
What should I do if I find out my teen is using substances?
Stay calm, assess immediate safety, and avoid minimizing the issue. Don’t ignore it. Consider a professional evaluation, especially if signs and symptoms continue. Early support can help address both substance use and any underlying mental health concerns.